Glamazons,
Lupita Nyong’o is enjoying her moment in the spotlight as a recent Yale graduate who delivered a critically-acclaimed and award-winning performance in her very first feature film, “12 Years a Slave.” On red carpets, she’s quickly become a fashion favorite for her striking bold, bright gowns that look resplendent against her flawless ebony skin. I celebrate her style not only because she’s elegant and stunning but because her dark skin is not a burden to her but a cause for celebration, a source of infinite beauty.
Growing up, I learned quickly that there is no value in trying to adapt to fit the mainstream ideal of beauty. It fuels a sense of inadequacy, resentment and dissatisfaction with yourself. Instead, you must discover your own beauty and embrace a style that celebrates that. For me, it wasn’t dark skin; it was my height and shape. Being thin and petite was by no means ideal growing up in a black community where tall and voluptuous women were put on a pedestal. All along, I had an adorable petite frame that looked good in most dress shapes, but I couldn’t dress to celebrate my body because I was too busy resenting it.
When I finally embraced myself, it showed in the clothes that I chose: A-line dresses, flared skirts and even rompers that were flattering on my little petite self. I finally felt beautiful and I wanted everyone around me to feel the same way. I’d encourage the gorgeous dark skin women in my family to wear brights that pop against their gorgeous tones. I’d make it a point to convince them they were beautiful and to tell them not to listen to the media, men that say they don’t prefer dark-skinned women, mean kids who teased them, etc. etc. (In fact, I had a harrowing conversation with a woman in Tobago about this very subject and will tell you about it later). But I realized sometimes you need to see someone who looks like you celebrating their beauty and that will inspire you to celebrate your own. I had Jada Pinkett-Smith, and Lupita Nyong’o had Alek Wek.
At Essence Black Women in Hollywood presented by Lincoln Motor Company (which I was supposed to attend but couldn’t as I’m on the #CaribbeanCrawl), Lupita accepted the Best Breakthrough Performance Award. In her speech, she talked about how she came to love her complexion, and cited Alek Wek as inspiration.
Here’s an excerpt:
“I remember a time when I too felt unbeautiful. I put on the TV and only saw pale skin, I got teased and taunted about my night-shaded skin. And my one prayer to God, the miracle worker, was that I would wake up lighter-skinned. The morning would come and I would be so excited about seeing my new skin that I would refuse to look down at myself until I was in front of a mirror because I wanted to see my fair face first. And every day I experienced the same disappointment of being just as dark as I was the day before. I tried to negotiate with God, I told him I would stop stealing sugar cubes at night if he gave me what I wanted, I would listen to my mother’s every word and never lose my school sweater again if he just made me a little lighter. But I guess God was unimpressed with my bargaining chips because He never listened.
And when I was a teenager my self-hate grew worse, as you can imagine happens with adolescence. My mother reminded me often that she thought that I was beautiful but that was no conservation, she’s my mother, of course she’s supposed to think I am beautiful. And then…Alek Wek. A celebrated model, she was dark as night, she was on all of the runways and in every magazine and everyone was talking about how beautiful she was. Even Oprah called her beautiful and that made it a fact. I couldn’t believe that people were embracing a woman who looked so much like me, as beautiful. My complexion had always been an obstacle to overcome and all of a sudden Oprah was telling me it wasn’t. It was perplexing and I wanted to reject it because I had begun to enjoy the seduction of inadequacy. But a flower couldn’t help but bloom inside of me, when I saw Alek I inadvertently saw a reflection of myself that I could not deny. Now, I had a spring in my step because I felt more seen, more appreciated by the far away gatekeepers of beauty. But around me the preference for my skin prevailed, to the courters that I thought mattered I was still unbeautiful. And my mother again would say to me you can’t eat beauty, it doesn’t feed you and these words plagued and bothered me; I didn’t really understand them until finally I realized that beauty was not a thing that I could acquire or consume, it was something that I just had to be.
And what my mother meant when she said you can’t eat beauty was that you can’t rely on how you look to sustain you. What is fundamentally beautiful is compassion for yourself and for those around you. That kind of beauty enflames the heart and enchants the soul. It is what got Patsey in so much trouble with her master, but it is also what has kept her story alive to this day. We remember the beauty of her spirit even after the beauty of her body has faded away.
And so I hope that my presence on your screens and in the magazines may lead you, young girl, on a similar journey. That you will feel the validation of your external beauty but also get to the deeper business of being beautiful inside. There is no shame in Black beauty.”
She also shared a letter from a young girl who was tempted to use bleaching cream until she saw Lupita Nyong’o and realized dark skin was a thing of beauty. Lupita‘s speech brought me to tears, Glamazons (and it may be a good thing I wasn’t there because I would’ve been boo-hooing in a fancy dress) because it really is a discovery I hope other women make, not just black women, but any woman who doesn’t fit the blonde, pale, tall, thin beauty standard. Those blonde women are beautiful but so is Lupita, so am I. Beauty comes in various skin tones, shapes, sizes and textures, and it’s been limited to one archetype for far too long.
Because Lupita dared to define beauty on her own terms, she’s now forcing Hollywood, and the world, to recognize just how stunning dark skin is and has always been. But more importantly, she’s giving dark-skinned women and girls the world over the motivation to look at their gorgeous skin and see the beauty in it for the first time.
Get Lupita Nyong’o’s Makeup Look
To give her skin a natural yet polished look at Essence Black Women in Hollywood, Lupita turned to makeup artist Nick Barose who used warm colors on her to create a sophisticated, elegant and youthful look. Get her look with these steps!
1. Gently dab the YSL Top Secrets All-In-One BB Cream Skintone Corrector in Dark into skin to hydrate, soothe and add radiance. Then gently apply L’Oréal Paris True Match Naturale Mineral Foundation in Soft Sable over the foundation to give skin a flawless finish and even out skin tone.
2. Use the YSL Eyebrow Pencil in 005 Ebony sparingly to fill in and shape brows, and then brush with a clean spool brush to even out and distribute color.
3. To highlight eyes, first add a winged line above the upper lash line and beneath the lower lash line using the L’Oreal Infallible Silkissime Eyeliner in Plum as it’s a perfect color for daytime that plays well with darker skin tones. Gently tap Lancôme Color Design Infinité Eye Shadow in 102 Timeless Taupe above the liner onto the lid to add a more bronzy color to the eyes. Apply two coats of L’Oréal Paris Voluminous Butterfly Mascara in Blackest Black to the upper lashes.
4. Dab cheeks lightly with a cream blush first, such as Giorgio Armani Blushing Fabric in Fresh Baby Pink to add a natural flush. On cheek bones only, dab a little bit of L’Oréal Paris Visible Lift Blush in Coral Lift to add a finished soft glow.
5. Create a polished glossy lip using L’Oréal Paris Extraordinaire by Colour Riche in 303 Rouge Allegro.
Gorgeous, inside and out.
Read Lupita‘s speech in full here. What do you think of her speech and her outfit at the event? Have you struggled with embracing your unique beauty? Tell me in the comments.
Kisses,
Glamazon Jessica
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